Awareness of Self and Other
Just as athletic ability depends on mind as much as body, so coaching ability could be said to depend on body as much as mind. If we are to work not just with our clients' thinking but with their sensations, feelings, emotions and behaviours, we need to take time to deepen our own self-awareness to help us distinguish more clearly what we may be responding to in ourselves and each other. In particular, our somatic awareness - the ability to pick up on and make sense of our own and others' bodily experience - can tell us a great deal about the interplay between us at a non-verbal level.
One way of developing such awareness is through regular mindfulness meditation (see Fleming, S. (2022) Know Thyself p219). We learn to stay present to the 'sensation of being' as it arises, and the deep compassion that can come with it. Below is the meditation I use in my morning routine and as preparation for meeting clients.
This practice can also help to ground us by activating the body’s 'rest and restore' mechanisms. Along with sleep, exercise and a wholesome diet, it reduces stress and builds our resilience for times when our work may be particularly challenging.
'A Deeper Meeting'
I awaken to this space
the sights, the sounds
the gift of now
this flow of breath
this beating heart
this skin that tingles
I scan for tensions
release each one
slip back into the flow
I open my heart
to a wider world
where all are one
------
Sitting before you
the space between us
resonates with being
Touched by humility
I let go of agendas
accept not-knowing
I see you, listen deeply
as you speak your truth:
memories shift
old certainties fray
time-served narratives
lose their grip
At last you’re free
to re-shape your story
find new ways to be
Henry Campion
Originally published in Coaching Perspectives, Issue 26 (July 2020), p14.
Inspired by Gregory Kramer, author of 'Insight Dialogue' (2007), a form of interpersonal
mindfulness practice; and the work of Daniel Siegel, psychiatrist and neuroscientist.